Update to "One of those days"

Well.... I ended up making an appointment yesterday, and they got me in in the afternoon. After a great visit with my Doctor who is a great friend as well, he concluded that I was still suffering from depression and that the current medication wasn't cutting it for me. So with that He has added another medication along with my current medication. I hope that it helps.
I suppose what has been going on for so long finally beat out the medication, and started to over power what sanity it was giving me. So here I cheer on the team of meds... "GO MEDS GO!" Don't let me down... knock the boots off that nasty depression and its side kick anxiety!

One of those days

Today is defiantly one of those days. Where you just want to crawl into a hole and stay there for a good while. In fact it seems to have been this way for a couple of months now. While I have had some really great days, and I have gotten things done, cleaned out and even have done some things I have wanted to try. It just isn't making up for the overwhelming need to run away.

Back a few months, there were some things that were said and done. Things that brought the past up and only caused more harm then good by doing so. Actions were taken place, people were pulled into all the mess... all to leave a gap, for lack of better words, in a family. Now with everyone on edge, and trying to move forward, it still manages to work around and back into my life. I wish that we were more kind to one another. I wish that we could open our eyes a bit more and move past what we cannot change. To understand that we don't always get what we hope for, or wish for, or even want in life. We are left with how we are going to handle said situation. Make the best of it, and be understanding of others capabilities and know that they are not out to get you, its just that life has given a opposite road to take then the one they wanted to take.
Love them regardless. Their life has been through hell, just like yours. Everything isn't peachy keen.

Then there is my Parents home. I has sold and it is getting close to closing time. There are still items that need to be moved out. And A LOT of bottles that need to be packed and moved as well.
This is a bitter sweet moment. While I'm looking forward to this chapter to close so that I may be able to not be reminded of them not being here whenever I needed to go to the house, or pick up the mail Its still hard to think that is that. Someone else will be living there. My Mom and Dad are really gone.

Add those two things to me gaining weight, having my body feel strange, pulling muscles left and right.... it makes for one of those days. It too will pass... I just hope I can survive!!
I am thankful for my Hubby... my kids... family... and friends that might as well be family. I am blessed. I need to focus on that more then the Ho-Hums of the day :]

Tavia

Tavia has the most squishy cheeks around!! These pictures were taken when she was 3 weeks old. Such a cutie! She just loves the camera... there for she was awake for most of the shots :] Her hair was so thick and long! It even had "highlights"! Such a sweet little girl!!

This is so much fun! Babies are so irresistible! I think at this rate I will be set until one of my girls has one of their own! No need for any more kids for me!! I will just keep taking pictures of babies!!! heehee ::Loves::

Clear as black and white

Black and White... You think it would be as simple as what the words read...

Since I have been able to take photos of two ADORABLE newborns, I have found when editing, that I'm in LOVE with the Black and White. The contrast of it all, and the softness of the skin... leaves me wanting to edit more in BW. Don't get me wrong, I love color as well, but mostly in nature, like flowers and such...

I tell Doug all the time why I got into photography... and he is a sweetheart for listening to me tell him over and over. It all started with a great black and white photographer by the name of Ansel Adams. His work is just amazing and inspiring! I fell in love with his work, and bought a book, along with a calendar of his photos, and another book just recently.

So going back to "its as clear as black and white" I'm thinking that I want to focus on black and white when it comes to babies, and perhaps people in general.... with a side of color. Instead of color with a side of BW.

Am I crazy? Or do you think I could run with this, and enjoy it all :] Of course fall time and anything with great color would remain color... :] But the rest... black and white. Majority.

I guess I will sleep on it.. think about it... sleep on it again... and sooooo on :]

Baby Javi

I was lucky enough to be able to take pictures of this sweet newborn. She is my friends newest little one.. and let me tell you... she is so sweet! Smells nummy.... and cures any baby hungry illness! It was my first chance to take photos of someone elses baby... and it was fun! I hope to do more of newborns! I also have been blessed to have the opportunity to take some family photos for some friends as well! (soon, that is)

To think that when my Mom and Dad bought me my first real camera for graduation, I would be where I am today. LOVING being able to make others happy by doing what brings me joy. Its a blessing beyond words. I wish that I could talk with my Mom about this new adventure that I have been given... there is something to be felt knowing and seeing your Mom or Dad cheer you on, and be happy with you and your progress in life. I know that they are with me, and know everything that is going on... but to, how do I say this, to have them "in person" and see them light up with joy right along with you.. well it is to be desired. I'm grateful for all my family, and most of all my friends who cheer me on... who get just as excited right along with me... you guys are my support... so thank you. It means the world to me...

So we will see where this new adventure takes me. I hope that I can continue enjoying life through my camera and with my Family and Friends. Its all I got. Loves to you all!!